Notes from a Pandemic to help us To Really Live in 2021

 Ok, that's a tad of a bold claim.

But that's the heart of this blog, of all I write, and this ebook experiment.

A bit of backstory about ebooks -

In 2017 I felt my writing well was rather dry so I gave myself permission to write something fun. The result was MEWSINGS - which involved three things:

(1) learning to self-publish

(2) helping an injured  migrant worker with some income as he sketches from photos of Chats

(3) gifting copies to SPCA for their funders

***

2020 the year of Clarity everyone had opined, is really been forcing us to see many things we have rather ignored, distract ourselves from, swept under the carpet.

Throughout this year, and especially during the first two months as the reality of a Pandemic unfolded before a shocked world, quite unprepared for this scale of disruption, I wrote bits and bytes to make sense of it all.

The result, among other things, is this little ebook: 

Notes From A PAN*IC ..*dem: getting ready for a new normal

My hope is that it can be useful for you to take stock and make some choices that will help you to really live, free, fierce and joyously fiery into 2021.

And honestly, this is how I feel about it all --

stay well,

jenni

I will not be silent !

When I miss a post,

I sweat a little.

Here's why.

I'm not a professional blogger, paid to write. Nor do I have eager fans waiting for RSS updates... So why fuss over how long since I last wrote?

There are many reasons one sweats over missing a beat.

One is driven to meet certain expectations (real or imagined).
One is a stickler for routine/habit.
One is guilt-stricken because one has made a promise to self or others.
One is worried to lose readers (social media gurus' mantra: don't miss a post!)
One loves doing it!

I am somewhere in the midst of all that, to be honest. On different days, different things propel me. It may be the same for you  - for coaching your kids, baking, designing or fishing!

But here's my top 2 reasons for keeping at it - giving it time, energy, attention - even if it doesn't pay any bills or bring other rewards commonly hoped for including fame (or infamy) and a following!


reason #1 : writing 'saves' me.

It does not save me the way God my savior does. But it is an ally in the process. Writing is the instrument of choice when it comes to gaining clarity, solidifying conviction, gathering heart rhythms onto a score sheet to see what tune it is playing.

I did not see it coming. But I have been teaching Journaling as a Spiritual Discipline for three years now; and it is such a delight to see hearts and minds awaken to deeper things!

Personally, with many thoughts and ideas bobbing around the waters of my soul-brain; I always feel much better each time after I write.

This belongs with a strange paradox worded like this by Jesus ~

"unless a seed falls to the ground and dies, it remains but a seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds." ~ John 12v24

When we give of ourselves, we take a risk and die to any self-preservation and protection. What I write can be misunderstood, misread or taken out of context. I could be labeled, accused, or bound up in some neat box by someone's notion of sensibility and right/wrong.

It isn't just writing. It is doing anything we find worthwhile and for which we will labour and 'put yourself out there'. Artists of all stripes understand this.

But this is God's way. Life comes on the back of sacrifice.

And lest we fed on a diet of heroics think this is Life for others; I have found, it is much more Life for myself first. Writing is like other aspects and areas of work and commitment: if God has called us to do it; the many seeds it produces is harvested first from our own lives.

Ask the mother who has the satisfaction of seeing her child come of age and mature well. In truth, the fruit of her labour and sacrifice were being carved onto her soul as she doles out the love each day.

Or the pastor / coach / manager who sees his efforts bear fruit, those hours of being alongside now seeing fruition as the mentoree / athelete / protege rise up to their potential. In truth, their persevering, believing, offering of second chances shaped their leadership ethos deeply.

I find that what God calls us to do serves us more than it serves Him. In his sufficiency and unfathomable wisdom; I doubt my few words put a dent in his univaserse. If it does, there is no way I can measure it. Sure, a comment or two may pop up (and that's really nice!), but where I can measure the difference is right here between the ribs!


reason #2: writing is words is meaning is power

Since God spoke the first words that became solid colour, design and life.
Since the Law was given.
Since the prophets railed and ranted.
Since The Word came in the flesh.
Since the bible was compiled.

There has been a battle to silent the Word. 

'Did God say...?' -- doubting the Word, began in the garden. It continues through the ages with skeptics, cynics, critics and couch potatoes. The word is sneered at, made light of, out-rightly rejected and rebutted.

What strange power. Sounds represented by letters strung together explode into embodiment of value, principle, truth, Life. Or else, falsehood, vain glories, exaggeration, simplification or distortion. It is an amazing thing this!

Today, this power is buzzing in many hands that hold a little device which allows each one to set forth their views and feelings with little censure.


So since God tapped me on the shoulder and pointed me in the direction of my bent - this love for words, this quest for meaning - He has given, shaped, edited my life and given me words for what I think, feel, intuit... and then He had said, "be bold and say it". I choose to believe that my very clumsy, often inadequate words are resonating a deeper, stronger Eternal One.

So reason # 2 can also be called Obedience.

Again, I do not always get to see the outcomes of my obedience. But as a child eager to please the parent, I am eager to do what blesses my Father's heart. And if the little lad and his lunch of fish and bread instructs me, I only have to bring what I have -- He takes it, breaks it, and can use it to satisfy the hunger of who-knows-how-many? I wait with wide-eye wonder to see what all the words over time will do.

Together with reason #1, this writing, this post, is then a Joyful Obedience.

Perhaps a cheeky borrowing of a famous verse ~

For God so loves me 

that He called me to write

to save my own soul

and encourage others.

Write Woes

This happens way-too-often. It is not acceptable; but I do not at the moment have any inkling what the real solution is. Of course, I can think up a good number of reasons for why it happens. But thinking up reasons do not naturally lead to a solution.

It is true that being a relatively weak swimmer and generally afraid of the sensation where I am not grounded, I must at least be tethered to something reliable, like a building. I did try diving once, and in a rather foolish manner too. The jolly folk took me to a swimming pool, taught me in an hour about how to breathe only through my mouth, and to beware of some oxygen bubble, and off we sailed towards the Great barrier Reef. Between all that money spent and the choppy waters, I let myself down clumsily, clung on to a rope as I bobbed hopelessly about. Since I could not ever remove that mouth piece, I screamed silently down the ten meters or so. So the reasoning that perhaps my struggle would break forth into a new freedom if I dared dive in wasn't a picture that quite worked for me. In fact, it felt akin to an invitation to take a walk in a black hole.  I have not been near one; but the vast ocean with no four steps to climb out of and a rim to make for feels a lot like a black hole to me; and it is a total waste of time to visit a black hole. What can one get out of it?

It is also true that I am a small person; and by this I do not merely mean my physical stature. I am fully aware that I can only stand in the shadows of the many great men and women who wield the pen and honestly will be at an utter and complete loss as to what to say if I should get a chance to talk with any of them; which is to say that they can say it and have said it all better than me anyway, so why bother.

It is also true that I live in a small country where we have for decades been feeding off the hands of what we deem to be our cultural superiors, the ang mohs. I am sure there is some psychological phenomenon with a label on it for this. The result is that local writers very rarely occupy any shelf space in a bookstore and if you write for a subset of the reading population; then that precious bit of real estate will not be allocated to you – yes, the way things are.

So - I have these thoughts, faces, ideas that seem to rise like a mist and they coax and cajole me every day. I think I am supposed to take a closer look, to dive deeper, to listen and then find the words and string them. But I don’t. Instead all I end up with is an infatuation. I never make a date. The appointment is not set, the exchange is not made, and the conversation is never recorded. I am feverish with excitement for the moments when the muse visits but my page is blank, still.

What genre? Where does it fit? Why would anyone care to read about the very first real-life Irishman I ever met? What if the said Irishman read it and I have totally warped who he is? I wouldn’t like to read what sounds so much like me that also make me out to be someone I am not. What to do.

I tried to tweet myself out of this, just. I composed an elegant one hundred and twenty characters. It feels better, as if, I at least showed up for work. But who am I fooling?

Perhaps in the end, the solution isn't rocket science. I just made my nine-year old redo his English composition. I should just mother myself into being a good child and getting my writing done.

Your ideas are welcome. Please leave them in the comments. Thank you!

something new: a blog hop, and my 4 answers to writing.

Martha whom I got to know on a facebook Writing group asked to introduce me on her blog as part of a Blog Hop!(if it were hip too...then, a hip blog hop...haha!). I said yes because -

i didn't want to say No to Martha! (I can say 'No').

it's really nice to have more people read my blog and find something they need.

reading other blogs have often been so life-giving for me. As a juggling stay-home-and-work mom; the internet is a useful source for this extrovert to feel connected with other adult humans; especially when they write honest, good, God-ward stuff.

What about you? Well with this Blog Hop my dear friend, you get to hop around a few blogs today just by clicking on the links! Perhaps you may find something just meet for your soul. I can pray so.

But first, remembering we met in a writing group and blogs are about writing; Martha asked me to answer 4 questions. So here goes -

1. What are you working on?

This is actually quite hard to talk about as I always have a few things buzzing around inside my lil head...and it all depends on what resources I come across and how much time I have. I am hugely relieved (though still nervous) about my recent book which launches in August, Shed Those Leaves - really an important message I want to share. It's about how we are so irreparably self-reliant that Grace is truly an alien idea to us. So it gets to the heart of the Good News. I am excited about the message and praying for it to have a good impact.

2. How does your work differ from those in your genre? 

The best response I get from my work is that I am raw and honest. For me, ideas are real and show up in life. Perhaps this is why even though I write non-fiction; I get into the material a lot and it's fun that way for the readers.

3. Why do you write what you do?

I do write a range of things - many stay in my folders. Mainly writing is something I need to do. It clarifies my thoughts and so helps me be a better communicator. I also preach and teach and train; and I always script for them. As for material; I write to seek meaning, connections, and a sense of hope. So whether it is on parenting, thoughts on what I read, a special features or reviewing a book; I am seeking to understand, and to help others find a way to see life that gives hope.

4. How does your writing process work?

I try to write a few times each week but I don't push myself to complete material unless there is a deadline! There is a lot of pre-writing when things are knocking around inside the head and heart though...but I found that often I write best when I respond to a surge of energy and ideas that seem to come forth from somewhere deep within. When I miss those moments; the writing tends to feel flat.

Now let me introduce you to 3 very different writers:

Martha
lives in USA, is a trained nurse and married 45 years to Ron, a pastor.
Her exciting blog mission is to :
help women understand themselves as daughters and not orphans
give women tools to mentor
encourage women to have cross-generational friendships for mutual benefit.

Now, who says "wohoo" to that?! I do!!


Next up, is "an ordinary girl striving to live everyday as God's big "show and tell" and
 simply trusting nothing about my past, present or future will be wasted in His capable and loving hands. Blooming where I'm planted and dancing on the dash!

We can all identify with that....
and I enjoy her energetic, honest, provocative writings.

Loretta

and of course, a fellow Singaporean ~ who was so closed to death, she now blogs at Alive & Kicking!
to celebrate faith, creativity and life!.
She is News Editor and you can check her favourite Scripture and songs on her blog.

Carol

Well, here we are, heeding the Voice and putting ours out there.
Let's hear yours too! Share with us in the comments!

OVERHEATED PROCESSING
o boy
what a week..i did everything but write. not too good at all. so at least, before the week is over, here i am trying to write something!! this is very serious as i have two major datelines up which are totally ambitious...but in case you think i've been a major lump of inertia; i assure you not.
this week i had to process major thoughts and feelings relating to a major decision plus i am fed-up enough of our young people being preyed on and having their lives expended on surface issues aka consumer agenda; i have been thinking of forming either (1) a think tank to brin gback beauty, truth and wonder into all levels of society (2) a mutli-racial n religious group to combat advertising that is insulting to intellignce, offensive to moral sensitivites and degrading to men and women by reducing us to a bundle of nerves.

want to join me? sign up right here!