23 Feb 2009

bad mom?

Does every generation agonize over their parenting or is it just ours?
My son resisted and fought me this past week - he refused to go to his nursery class. Somehow, something had upset him and he changed from his usual extroverted, bubbly self to this scaredy cat the moment it was time to step into the large room they began their day.
I was of course frustrated on multiple levels: what will happen to my daily routine if he keeps this up? what is really bothering him; did something awful happen? what am i to do that will best help him and me? why is this happening to me?....
The poor fella tried his best to explain about some fear he has. Next comes the needful conversation with the teacher, and a strategy to move this whole uhappy experience forward in a way that will help him embrace changes and develop courage.
All this time, I felt a strange sadness with lots of tears to swirl it all around in...
Perhaps it's how we expect life to be efficient these days; but we really rant and bulk when there are surprises and challenges don't we?
We can try our darndest to be prepared but there will always be something that can threaten to take us off course.
I finally found peace when I sat down with a cup of tea and read my Bible and a book I had with me. Then I returned to the challenge feeling more clear headed and calm hearted and I saw I all that was on my side: prayer, asserting myself for my child's interest, the support of spouse and friends.
Phew. He still fights it; but we will win this small battle together and we shall both be stronger for it! Way to go sweet son!

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