16 Sep 2015

Small things that cause Big Trouble... like Doubts

Since my bout with dengue, I am more alert to tiny things that wreck major havoc.

Consider the microscopic Yersinia Pestis {the name tells you it's up to no good} -- that's the one the rats carried around causing The Black Death which wiped out nearly half of Europe's population!

A lot of small things can cause big trouble.

It may not take much imagination to consider how these can lead to greater woes from marital break-downs to criminal liability. But there are other small things we let slip which over time can lead to serious trouble too.

Consider the following:

Laziness can result in habits that undermine one's potential, can mean important things are left unsaid and undone.
Inaccuracy can lead to untruth. It's easy in our anger and tiredness to gloss over things or shorten what we need to express. But so much trouble ensues because we don't tell the whole story.
A lack of gratitude can lead to callousness, cynicism and a critical attitude.

{if any of these are calling out to you, this is where to stop reading and start asking yourself some hard Qs, and perhaps talk to someone you trust}

There is yet another set of seemingly small stuff that when undealt with can gather itself into a mountainous pile that gets too huge to surmount. Doubts.

Here is a plague that affects us all.

Whether they come in the form of

regrets (I should have / I wonder if..)
questions (can it be / it doesn't make sense / I feel it's unfair, strange, wrong...)
fears (what if..)

I live with these doubts. I journey with others about their doubts.

Alas few of us have learnt how to live with them in a way that is constructive. Instead, we often receive very unhelpful counsel such as -

it is wrong and a lack of faith to doubt
there is no absolute
we are being too subjective

So being the busy creatures we are, we ignore and stuff them up and away. But it doesn't work well - not for long.

If you continually battle doubts about your faith, spouse, work, self -- the doubts will seep out or they will pile up. They also colour our perspective and can distort our view, making things much worse than they are!

Doubts by Rae Henrietta 1886

The best thing to do in the face of all doubts is to have a true, honest conversation - first with yourself; then with someone you trust. I describe it here. {right click to read}

It is also important to distinguish which of 3 kinds of doubt {right click to read} you are grappling with so you can volley the right response at it!

Our doubts are us wanting to be sure. They demand an answer  and will echo around the chambers of your heart until it becomes a ruckus! So face them. Just remember, "there may be no answer to this one at this point of time" is an answer, when uttered in honesty after effort has been expended.

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