Why Home-sickness is a good place to begin your 2014

Happy New Year!

How will you be travelling this year? There are four modes of moving along:

a/ well-planned to the hilt
you already have your goals and plans, a list of things to do by the end of January. Some more seasoned travelers by this mode would even have included safety precautions and back-up plans.

b/ tumbling or drifting
you basically dislike to plan. after all, things don't necessarily go your way (before or ever); so going with the flow is just easier: no fuss, no fight, no fire (to put out).

c/ pushed onward
there are strong forces within you that propel you or there are expectations you know you need to live up to.

d/ hanging on to a string of reactions
you may have goals and aspirations; but in reality, your travel style is to wait-and-see how things turn. You can get red-hot mad or walk away, depending on how you feel you are being treated.

Most of us will be using some combination of these four. But there is a fifth way. It is the way of God's Grace. This way sits at the bottom of all other ways, it also holds and weaves through the other modes of travel. For most of us, most of the time though, we are only vaguely aware of this ever-present Grace.
Why not live aware and upon this Grace so that each time we sing 'Amazing Grace', it is a distinct sense of awe with specific recollections and not vague ideas about how Amazing Grace truly is!

The way of God's Grace is to live tethered to God and His homeward call to us. It is living with a sense of homesickness.

I am rather a person on the move, relishing new experiences and challenges. But whether I am out for the day or away for weeks, a special feeling surges up in my soul as i turn homeward. It feels like a homesickness. I have missed home and hearth. I have missed the safe, familiar, comfortable, 'my place' sense.

It is the well-rooted tree that can spread its branches wide out and continue to bear fruit without over-stretching or toppling over.

Where is home for you? A small spot of ground or a huge house isn't what matters. It is where your heart rests that is home.

God is our home - for those of us who are His children because we believe that Jesus Christ died for our sins and want to live for Him. We go home to God often and dare not run wild and distracted that we cannot find our way home to rest and be restored.

Kingdom is our home - for those of us who are God's new people, called to build a different way of living; we find home when we are among those who share this same dream of a peaceable Kingdom in our broken-up world.

I get homesick a lot like when -
I've been waddling in shallows making waves when I can say 'see ya later' to everything and everyone and go out to the deep and float free.

I am fussing over the stuff that doesn't really count or last and then a ray of Kingdom light and eternity shines across my shoulder and I need to turn my eyes to see.

I am busy counting my small pile of gold coins of 'have', 'need', 'want more of', and forget that's just pavement where I am headed - it's the wrong currency to trade in

I see a picture of grim need, an old wrinkled face, a broken-hearted parent whose child was here a moment before that shrapnel came whizzing past

I need to feel this homesickness. You do too. For in the end, we are pilgrims, travelers, aliens, a-passing-through. And it is this homesickness - our desperate need for God, our deep convictions of a different world, that will help us travel by the mode of Grace.

As we beat our own path to God-home and soak in Grace, our hearts and minds expanding with Him.
As we work out our salvation by living as saved ones, building a different world, and know it will never happen apart from Grace-miracles where our pockets, priorities and perspectives shifting from sand to rock.

So yes, Home-sickness is a good place to begin your 2014.


Happy NEW year friends!

How did God see your 2013?

What is the first emotion that comes as you think of 2013?

If you could draw a picture to represent the year, what would you draw?

Some of us hitch onto some happy moment, grin and tumble into the new year. Some of us wince at certain memories and maybe even fight to fend off the sense that we blew it again. Doubtless for most of us in mostly sunny Singapore, our days were a busy mix of getting around, chasing deals and forging goals. It can be hard to tease our jam-packed days apart to see what they were truly about.

- The unexamined life is not worth living - Socrates

But how do we examine our lives? What do we use to map our days against? What grid, or guide do we have? Our ever-present tendency is to compare ourselves with... some ideal, and often feel like we have been given the short end of the stick again.

Recently, i thought that even being on Facebook can do enormous harm: we may be sick, jobless, lost...and it seems the whole world is having a great time without us - all the pictures of balmy scenes, happy faces, wise words, great times... people are going places and doing stuff. Life is happening without us.

Facebook tries to help with a review of your year by stitching together all your posts and updates that received the highest 'likes'. Ah, all is not lost, i was heard; someone laughed at my joke, someone noticed my melancholy, someone liked my pictures.

As I was preparing to lead my church tomorrow for a time of reflection; I think of Jesus' words that sets up that contrast between life and death. He offers us life abundant - and warns us of the living reality that we have an enemy who wants to steal, kill and destroy.

Perhaps if we recognise that this dynamic presents itself to us each day - that within each day, we are posed a question: would you have life or not? I think of how our feelings, thoughts and circumstances may well be God's invitation and offer to live more fully and free.

I imagine looking at my life from the outside - and seeing it through God's eyes. What then of my 2013? How does God feel about my year nearly gone? What picture would he draw?

Selah.

Psalm 139 & more {enjoy}

Why not have some face-time with God and just remember - He is the God who made you, loves you and constantly, and faithfully invites you to go deeper. To live.

CHRISTmas manifesto

manifesto (n) :  a written statement declaring publicly the intentions, motives, or views of its issuer

Yesterday in the enlivening cover of the cool morning air, it dawned on me that Christmas, orchestrated before time, wild beyond our imaginations, had come with some 'instructions'. God has not left it all shadowy and open to speculation. There isn't meant to be twenty versions of how, who, what about Christmas. 

God first unveiled the CHRISTmas manifesto some seven hundred years to an statesman-prophet Isaiah:

The people that walked in darkness have seen a great light;

on the inhabitants of a country in shadow dark as death

light has blazed forth

For a son has been born for us,

a son has been given to us..

No more stumbling in the dark. No more trying this way and that.

A blazing light is now available. turn your sights and be dazzled and find it's illuminating rays all about you - a warm, strong cloak that says you are known and you are safe.

All of us share this little child, this boy. Ours. Come close and stroke his soft cheeks. This gift of life -yours and mine together! You did not father him, i did not carry him; yet now, he is ours!

Each of us look at a child and marvel, wonder, wish... But with this child, this CHRIST, we are given understanding about how to see him. He's not here to fulfil our wishes. His character, abilities and impact are described for us:

dominion has been laid on his shoulders

and this is the name he has been given,

Wonder-Counsellor

Ask of the CHRIST what you need to have a heart full of wonder and worship. We live too often at the level of mere function. It's a tic-toc world and we are satisfied with clockwork. God did not create us - setting us in a lush garden filled with creation that continues to baffle and dazzle us, just so we can get on with it. No, we're meant to marvel, wonder, gasp in awe and let is all come out in praise and adoration of the Creator. The very lives we have, each sometimes so filled with mundane minutiae are no less works of Grace and tender love. We need this season to see our lives with fresh eyes - to ask the wonder-counsellor for eyes to see, heart to feel and minds to think brave.

Mighty-God

Yes, it's but a helpless babe. But he has come to destroy the works of the devil and rescue the world from darkness' clutches. Might is all His. Might is defined by him. Where do you feel weak, unable and afraid, overwhelmed and intimidated this season? Go to the God of might. Sit with Him for He is a giving presence. Go often and come away stronger.

Eternal-Father

Your father and mine - busy, absent, careless, no longer around... The strength, direction, example we long for is available. Christ shows u God is our eternal father. Our failures, crazed ideas and inconsistency won't turn him away. He will always be.

Prince-of-Peace

O to come to Christ and just feel the peace. No words needed.

I'm guessing one of these means more to you now. Go ahead, write it down, draw it, dream it, memorize it, sing it, dance it! 

The gift has been delivered. Go ahead, unwrap it and enjoy it. You need Him.

{the New Jerusalem Bible NJB is used here}

Let these WOW snowflakes' message melt into you...

God certainly delights in what He does...  {click}

This Christmas season, allow Him to do his wonders in your life.

How?
Stop demanding,
questioning
looking back
whining

but -
pray for eyes to see
heart to feel
mind that will think clear

look again at the snowflakes and let its beauty melt into your being and water the dry, thirsty land within.

Discovering God

Last night as I led a few leaders in a time of sharing about the past year in our lives; a brother talked about how his recent experiences helped him see that there are moments in life when it all boils down to you-and-God. No one else can quite enter your experience, bear the pain or help with understanding. Only One remains present, attending, and able to help. 

Yet, it will take us all a while to learn this deep truth that we indeed have a Heavenly Father, a God who offers help, a God who does carry us, a God who will grant wisdom, provide rest and bring healing.

When King Saul's jealousy and possible psychosis got the better of him, he hunted for David like a crazed predator for four years. Naturally, David feared for his life - and fear can make us do many things.
David went to the high priest for help. Later he went to enemy territory to hide. Everywhere David turned, people became implicated and sometimes suffered from the fallout of the conflict between Saul and David.

It looked like the sheer fear for his life was going to layer on with more: grief for what Saul would do to others who are innocent.

In our desperate moments, we will often turn for help - and sometimes, like a drowning man, we cling so tight to anyone or anything that can help; and drown that too.

There is instruction in this.

Equally, the four years David spent running for his life did something for him as all of these things happened. He crafted the Psalms that today reveal what depths a man and his God can get to.

In God alone there is rest for my soul

nowhere else
nothing else
no one else

In God is my safety

Not here
There
in him/her
in this/that

In God is my refuge

no need to flee
panic
fret
for God, ever-Present is.

David of course, eventually becomes the King God has anointed him to be. The dream God inked on his heart will come to pass even if it has to nearly die first. The king God saw fit to stand through a nation's history as king par excellence and as a pre-figure for Christ - that king who will build God's kingdom ways in a people, must know his God to the depths a mortal may be granted to. Yes, much of it came through a cauldron of human suffering we all seek to avoid: fear, threat of death, loneliness, emptiness, defeat, humiliation... But perhaps as John the Baptist would put it a thousand years later, "He must increase, I must decrease". More of God, less of me.

Christ on the Cross with John the Baptist and King David by
Schaufelein, Hans Leonard c1480-1539

note: These experiences and insights about God are reocrded in Psalm 62 - lyrics and music for a head Levite named Jeduthun* -one of three chief Levites; whom some deduce may be David's music teacher! 

Bereft. The feeling of losing something precious permanently.

Most hearts eventually have to reckon with this overpowering sensation.
This week someone got drunk. Another drags on more cigarettes than she intended to. Another walks, life around but not within her.

It's a dark night where the sun doesn't seem to rise. Negative emotions overrun while positive ones seem to have gone into hiding. Tears make their way to the surface without the least effort. There is little fire left in desires as everything feels blah.


It could be an unexpected, bad shattering news or a slow dawning sense that things are not as they seem; until a point of clarity reveals the truth of the situation.  Either way, nothing will be the same again.

It's hard to know what to say - to self, and others.  After all, it is like being forcibly sucked into a blackhole.

Young shepherd David lived and acted based on his faith in, and fervor for God. He served the King, he defeated the enemy. Despite his noble choices and right moves and the well-known praise and accolades he was receiving; the truth of the situation began to emerge: he had aroused the jealousy of King Saul. The tension turned into threat to his life, and as with all situations, things compound. When we reach Psalm 52, David was reeling from the devastating news that eighty-give priests were killed on account of him. The Psalm is a poetic way to teach truth; in this case, David asserts that through the reversals and losses, he will refuse to play the cynic. Instead, he senses God's hand on him and wrote ~

I, like a flourishing olive tree 
in the house of God,
put my trust in God's faithful love,
for ever and ever

There is much that didn't make sense. God's king has an inverted sense of what is right. David is targetted for treason. Others are implicated and killed. Everything is a mess; God it seems, has left the building. It would be easy to feel sorry, to rile, to strike back, to curl up into a ball and cry softly to death.

Goliath's sword that priest Ahimelech gave to David {1 Sam 21}  

Meanwhile, history tells us that some four hundred ragamuffins - "in distress, in debt, had a grievance" looked to David as their leader. {1 Samuel 22} Most leaders today will run a mile wide from such candidates for discipleship or leadership. But by chapter 23, the number had swollen to six hundred. A leader on the run for his life; battling darkness of guilt for causing the death of others, the pain of false accusation, the demands of broken people. He says he is a flourishing tree!

There is a core to our being that can be unshaken - for it is held, defined and kept by One who alone gives, sustains and protects life:

God did not deliver him into Saul's power {1 Sam 23v14}





Things will happen to us.
But God decides what to deliver us to. With the Cross, there is only one option for God: God will safeguard us for himself. He will deliver us up to Grace, restoration, healing, peace, truth, and power.

We may feel like we are in a blackhole, spinning helplessly. We don't know what to say or how to respond. But like David, we can resist the blackhole's power to snuff us out because Life is in us and nothing can extinguish that.
Indeed, we can afford to lose anything and everything because we will never lose what is essential: our loved selves. We are all olive trees that flourish because in the worst of days and nights, there is still God's faithful love and His goodness toward us. 

God is with us, storm-tossed world - Psalm 46

10,000 is a big number. But it's far more than a number when every single digit represents a life, a dream, a promise - each linked to other hearts and hopes. We are simply not capable of wrapping our minds around what it means. Our own little life can already get too much. This week though, we must all take our eyes and look further - the images and numbers must stop us in our tracks; hopefully long enough to make a difference.*

from Mash

from The Guardian

God's people have never lived in isolation. They lived in relation to others - seeking to bless them. This they do well only if they began in the right place. Today's Psalm provides this right place, a starting point. 

It is a worship song written for the instrument that sets the tone for all the other instruments in our modern symphonies. It is the song, the theology that sets the bar for everything else to align to. 
It is about how God is ~

refuge and strength for his people
a ready help when we are in trouble

so that - like this week, as we witnessed the massive destruction and loss from typhoon Haiyan; when the water roar and seethe and even mountains totter and tumble -

we are not afraid.

this is the emotion the truth of God addresses. Fear.

we ought to feel many things: sadness, grief, empathy, compassion, anger at authorities and corruption, angst over human sloth and on.. but we are not to fear for YHWH Sabaoth, the LORD who has armies at his disposal is with us.

I have a live-in Filipino helper who was back in her homeland as this typhoon blasted across. She comes from the region Iloilo. There was much devastation and many lost homes they took years to build from money they remit home from working far away from home and loved ones. Eva, my helper too had saved and helped her family built a small brick house on their farm. When I shared my concern with my daughter, she immediately said, "if it's destroyed we must give her the money to build a new one! Look at those filmsy houses; she must build one with a good foundation!"

A good foundation is critical. Good sturdy material can make all the difference.


Most of all though, a stout heart is what stands the inevitable storms of life. A heart that has learnt to be still, still enough to know in a deep way that God is God, supreme over the world; that God is God, and with us who are his people; simply because we choose to turn our eyes to him and believe.

Be still and acknowledge that I am God,
supreme over nations, supreme over the world. {v10}

What have I seen in my stillness?
I have seen a God so great I cannot define and describe.
I have seen humanity so wretched I know we need a Saviour.
I have seen my own heart filled with many emotions; including a frustrating tension at what to say to my children who asked, "will it come to Singapore?... Phew!"
I have seen that the losses will truly be in vain if we will not allow them to tutor our hearts toward contentment and compassion.

Why don't you shut off the news and turn inward and be still before God. Being still will lead to a knowing you need for the living you long for.

We come, to let His love rest on us

A vivid sensing came today: it is us in our busy days with our needs churning within us looking hither, thither for answers. We are busy reading off the Net, taking notes, making plans, trying to squeeze any juice of hope from these mostly dry places just to keep going. How nice to be able to just stop, have a totally lazy day and chill! But the wheels crank on and our hearts long for a rest that is deep, satisfying, and renewing.
How nice.

Recently i saw that magnum opus of a movie Gravity. Many minutes into the show, I felt a sensation of weightlesness and a slight sense of anxiety coming over me as i witnessed Sandra Bullock float-leap-crawl from space to space. It felt better whenever she was inside some capsule, but O, the endless expanse of space... and that dread moment when her colleague Clooney cut off the tether... Solid ground, give me solid ground - and soon! It was a palpable relief when she finally landed on earth.

Psalm 33v22 ~
YHWH, let your faithful love rest on us,
as our hope has rested in you.

We look up to people, watch for signs that the circumstances have shifted, yearn to hear a 'well done', 'thank you', 'I love you'.... and we are restless. God is near but so so far. Holiness is a benchmark we strive for rather than the amazing Grace presence that has opened up to us and now touches every little spot of our lives.

But - after the roving and roaming, if we will, our need for hope, our sense of hope can connect with Hope itself, tethered safe.

When we can stop clambering, worried and scared to death that we won't make it; and gather all of what we need and long for into a bundle and sit with God. 
Let our hope -- rest . in . You! 

Then, we shall see that God is waiting for us to be still enough to feel his Love resting upon us.

Yes, things will happen, people will hurt and disappoint, we will make dastardly mistakes...but we are never cut off to float into nothingness. What's more, we can regularly, deliberately, gather our life-bundle and sit with God, learning to be still enough to experience the Holy One loving us. Wow.

{here's one way: A Quiet Morning }

When It's All Too Much & You Nearly Give Up

Psalm 32 begins with a powerful definition: the one who is Blessed is the one who has been made right with God. 

When we are mired in our sins and other's sins, when we are overwhelmed, tired, near-depression... we need to recollect that our most important need has been met. As the Westminster catechism* puts it, our only hope in life and death is that we already have hope because we believe in Jesus Christ and have received his gift of forgiveness and reconciliation. Everything else is add-on; and nothing can take this away if we refuse to let it go.

Out of this place of a living relationship with God restored we negotiate & navigate life - and never ever all by ourselves even if it feels so.

God's active presence in our lives is easy to overlook and can be difficult to spot because our reflex to pain and threat is self-preservation; to use our own understanding and means to protect, shield, and vindicate ourselves.

This self-reflex is named for what it is: sin.
It's been said the word sin has 'I' in the middle of it. The indications are not hard to see:

self-pity ~ I'm so poor thing

blame ~ he/she is hurting, stifling, unfair, insensitive (and it's probably true: of them, but just as true of you and me!)

comparison ~ after more than twenty-five years my pay is less than a fresh grad (this is mine)

envy ~ he's so patient with her, what co-operative children...

pride ~ you don't have any idea

When we are willing to see that wrapped in our very real pain is this persistent thread of self; we can cry out for help and be ready to receive it. this is when our hearts and eyes open to see:

God has not let the waters swept us off

There are songs, hints, intimations of deliverance

God is guiding us with his eye constantly on us!
{this one comes with a vivid picture that has 2 applications:
Firstly, don't be like an animal that must be guided by constraints. We are children of God that are guided by an intimate walk with God; making choices out of our love for our Father, wanting to please and honour Him. But at times we simply don't. When that happens, then don't be like a wild horse that runs from what is needed for guidance. When a horse subjects itself to a loving master, it will be fed, cleaned, cherished and learn to use all its prowess to demonstrate what it's truly capable of. God may have to use a bit and bridle - limits; but when we relax to trust, these limits lead us to focus, to feast, to flourish. As we grow in trust, we walk in freedom more and more as children of God, confident that our motives guide our choices aright}

freedigitalphotos.net

We are enfolded in faithful love

So lift your heart to God today my friend, like, right now.

*the Westminster catechism is a Reformed church document developed using a series of Qs to help new believers become grounded in basic and definitive faith doctrines so that they are guided in their life. Click here for one site on it

Healing for help

Psalms 30:2 ~

O LORD my God, I cried to you for help,

and you have healed me.

 This is a Psalm of a cry for help and an experience of being saved from mortal danger. Perhaps it refers to a sickness, hence the healing. But mortal danger and the threat to life can come in many forms.

 Whatever form it takes though, our one desire is to be rid of it quickly and painlessly.

 I am wrecking my brain for a story in the bible where God airlifts the person out of his troubles. The only ones i know are the ones on their way home namely, Enoch & Elijah.

In fact, this imagery came vividly to me once when I was so sick and tired of some ongoing troubles I had: I saw a huge 'X' over a common rescue scene - a helicopter with a lifeline lowered! The message to me was,"no,not this way". It was reinforced by another impression I had perhaps a year earlier when I felt God say to me, "you need to walk though this"- and immediately I recall the famous line from Psalm  23, 'the valley of the shadow of death..'.

We want help; we get healing.

God takes us through the tunnel, the dark, the death, and makes us more well, more complete, more whole. The help God gives is not a short-term relief but an eternity-set goodness ... We know honestly that we don't have the patience for ourselves; the way we keep making those same silly mistakes and horrendous self-centred ways we inflict others and ourselves with pain. God alone has the distance of patience, goodness, forgiveness, and gentle enabling we need to unlearn, and to relearn about... life and love.

Thing is when we deny or ignore the dark, it doesn't go away. God's way is to vanquish it; to strip it of its power over us. He does this by taking us by the hand and walking with us into those dark places so that His Light may illumine and take away the dread- as we discover that these 'monsters under our bed' are really   not.so.powerful.

Cry to God for help - and get ready to be healed.

No. 19 - aware of, in awe, and a prayer to YHWH

Many years ago, a young Pakistani young who visited our little fellowship sang a song out of the 18th Psalm. If i can figure out how, I may sing it for us here...that simple 3-chord song helped me fall in love with the power of the Psalms.

Several years later, I encountered the next Psalm, no.19. It was a time when i needed a strong anchor for my life - and the resounding confidence of the Psalmist drove those words clear into the marrow of my convictions~

"the Law of the LORD is perfect
reviving the soul"

It riveted my attention and pegged my will to a posture of submission.

So, today i share with us my gleanings as I visit no. 19 and I see in it a Psalm of Awakening. 

It begins with being stirred to see God's hand in creation and His massive rule over it all. 

The heavens declare the glory of God..
from the entire earth the design stands out,
the message reaches the whole world...
and nothing can escape his heat.

Just look ! {click}

The One who speaks the words that bring into being also has words for us which enlivens, guides and brings joy!

the Law of YHWH is perfect,
refreshment to the soul, ...
wisdom for the simple. 
the precepts of YHWH are honest,
joy for the heart; ...
light for the eyes.

YHWH creator God whose Presence looms large over all and who has established moral law is therefore to be acknowledged with fear and His judgement to be sought. 

How often do we pause to think how God judges a situation? I rarely hear of this in God-speak today; mostly I hear us accusing / questioning / God for failing to align with our judgment of the situation and so being blind to our very necessary needs!

This awakening leads into the prayer to be free from all our crazy self-enamoured tendencies-

who can detect his own failings?
wash away my hidden faults.
and from pride, preserve your servant,
never let it be my master...

and finally, this:

May the words of my mouth always find favour,
and the whispering of my heart, {yes, our hearts whisper / murmur / rant!}
in your presence, YHWH,
my rock, my redeemer.

psalm 12 - a current version

Idiot Psalm 12
A psalm of Isaak, amid uncommon darkness

O Being both far distant and most near,
O Lover embracing all unlovable, O Tender
Tether binding us together, and binding, yea
and tenderly, Your Person to ourselves,
Being both beyond our ken, and kindred, One
whose dire energies invest such clay as ours
with patent animation, O Secret One secreting
life anew into our every tissue moribund,
afresh unto our stale and stalling craft,
grant in this obscurity a little light.

With thanks to ~
Scott Cairns (PhD University of Utah)
American poet, memoirist, librettist, and essayist. 
Catherine Paine Middlebush Chair in English at the University of Missouri
taken from: here {click}

A Psalm pick-me-up

Raise your hand if you have felt --

like someone understood when you read the Psalms

like God has come close

reality is drawn out and the massive sense of being drowned ebbs away...

The Psalms are an amazing collection of pick-me-ups; affirming our frailty and calling us to faith. 

Today, I share with us how the Psalms fall into four large categories; and with this knowledge, you may know better where to turn  ---

1. hymns which begin with praise and recounts God's marvel in creation and acts of redemption and end again with a praise rejoinder.

These Psalms are great for personal, family and corporate worship! You can use he beginnings and write you own experience of God's wonder in creation or list out recent experiences of His Grace. A wonderful exercise of reflecting on God's presence and goodness for every one; i imagine the little ones can easily join in the grand fun!

{8,, 19,29,33, 46-48, 76, 84, 93, 96-100, 113, 114, 117, 122, 135, 136, 145-150}

2. Laments and cries for help directly calling out to God, often with a description of the woes and troubles, a sense of God's absence in some; and a re-assertion of faith in God. In some, the faith assertion ends the Psalm abruptly or is followed by a note of thanks; signaling a change in mood.
These Psalms model authenticity and a generous dash of audacity! But who can we open the depths of our being to - who will not cringe, counter-suggest, or try to command our feelings another way? God, i once told my seven year-old nephew is like a huge sponge and He can take anything that is spilling out of us.
Personally, these Psalms are the very things that first moved me to take up pen and begin writing my heart. I haven't stopped - for God has shown what a heart can fill up with...
Interestingly, these entreaties are not all solo. Groups can come together to mourn, wail, and cry before God. 

{Individual: 3, 5-7, 13, 17, 22, 25, 26, 28, 31, 25, 38, 42-43, 51, 54-57, 59, 63, 64, 69-71, 77, 86, 102, 120, 130, 140-143}
{Group: 12, 44, 60, 74, 80, 83, 85, 106, 123, 129, 137}

3. Thanksgiving Psalms are fantastic for any season for we are a people called to the way of grateful-ness. 

Alone or with others, giving thanks deepens our faith as we lift our eyes and hearts upward.

{18, 21, 30, 33, 34, 40, 65-58, 92, 116, 118, 124, 129, 138, 144}

4. Then there are Psalms that combine the elements such that one Psalm has hymn+cry+thanks. Psalm 119 stands like a tall tower as it develops the whole idea of God's Word with the human condition weaved in; making it sound a lot like Wisdom literature (ie. Proverbs, Ecclesiastes group). Finally, there are those Psalms that clearly have a prophetic pointing-to-Christ element. {2, 50, 75, 81, 82, 85, 95, 110}. 

What a grand idea to read these Psalms during Advent {link} as we prepare once again to welcome God's Amazing gift that begin with a young couple's outrageous obedience.

advent

ˈadv(ə)nt,-vɛnt/

noun

1. 1.

   the arrival of a notable person or thing.

   "the advent of television"

   synonyms:

   arrival, appearance, emergence, materialization, surfacing, occurrence,dawn, origin, birth, rise, development; More
2. 2.

   the first season of the Church year, leading up to Christmas and including the four preceding Sundays.

Which Psalm has held special meaning for you; touched you in a deep place... I'll be delighted for you to share it here with us. 

[notes from The New Jerusalem Bible]

Of the weak, and our equal need for final hope

Today we look at Psalm 9-10 which is really one Psalm, written as an acrostic, using the Alphabets to start off each line. It's a great way to remember things! You can hear it read in Hebrew here: Psalm 9 read in Hebrew.

i attempt a little acrostic for us ~ the Psalm itself is not a complete acrostic; and of course we won't use all of the English alphabets...

A~
Alleluia! {do this in a tune that comes to your mind! it's for singing!}

B~
Based on your judgement that acquits me, my enemies beat a retreat

C~
Complete cities and nations are wiped out

D~ 
Dethrone You? No way? Judgement is coming.

E~
Everyone who fears you receives your help

F~
For you remember, and so we sing

G~
God! hold me safe so I can sing happily of your rescue

H~
How apt- You reveal yourself as nations are caught in their own sin

{pause with muted music}

N~
Nations that disregard you ought to go to burn

O~
Oppressed ones will be remembered, their longing will materialise for You will bring to trial and show that we are but mortals

P~
Pity the weak, you seem far off...and the wicked disdains your reality..

R~
Rude, boastful, and scheming, they assume you are too 'soft' to deal with them and they pursue their gain at the expense of the weak and poor; who have become bait and prey.

S~
See! Surely you see it and measure it all-- for to the orphan you are the only recourse.

T~
Totally break the power of the wicked and evil for you are King to everlasting.

In a sense, we who live in affluence will never touch the heart of the cry in Psalms 6-7 and 9-10 - unless- we reach, touch and choose to carry the hurt, losses, and the sense of hopelessness many in the world feel. As Jesus reminds us, 'the poor are ever with us'. The crazy spirit and law of this world  ensures that as man seek gain in expense of each other.

In this regard, we can all be guilty. Have we not sought our own good, comfort, well-being above that of others; and perhaps at time, at the expense of others? The getting-so-hot earth is a like a heating cauldron where the things will boil and rush over... because we seek lifestyles that the earth was not designed to provide. The life we get so used to - churning out carbon and waste and phenomenal rates is one our brothers and sisters in other parts will not have. Their portion is to work in the sun -- and we make their work harder as the heat turns up while we hide in our air-con rooms.

Can you and I understand these Psalms? Pray them?

They are there in Scripture: we can, and we must. For even in our 'good life' we too know suffering through sickness, loss and power-play. These Psalms then unite us with those who seem so different - as we both cry to God as our Source of Hope. And hopefully, we look at what we have and share it; trusting God to finally break the power of evil forever.

p.s. - i take a break from writing over the weekend. journal and write your own reflections and share them with us! Selah.

a morning and evening Psalm

I reverse the sequence. Psalm 5 is a morning Psalm; 4 is an evening prayer.

Psalm 5~ 
v11 -  JOY for all who take refuse in You,
endless songs of gladness!

that's verse 11 though -and we get to verse 11 in our days. But often, with the many things we carry upon our shoulders and in our hearts, we wake up dreary with verse 1's 'listen to my cry for help!'. And it's a good way to begin the day: set our sights on the One and 'lay our case before him' (v3) to call to mind who God is - One who does not delight in perversion and injustice but will act decisively against such perpetrators. So the morning prayer quietens down to this

'lead me, make your way plain' (v8),

 and a sobering reminder that YHWH is the one who will protect for his favour works like a shield. (v12).


Psalm 4~
is an end-of-day time with God. And o how we know that even as we worked and wished and wrestled through our day, we often come face to with one more 'w' -weariness. So the question before us:

'how long will you be heavy of heart,

why love what is vain and chase after illusions?'

and i ask to be shown what vanities have captured my attention, what crazy notions have become so important to me? Prone to wonder and wander, to want to define our path... figure out our itinerary... we do it so well with travel plans and career and even relationships perhaps --  but somehow, life at large escapes us. Our success in the pieces don't set in place a clear picture of peace. Vanities and illusions abound.

indeed,

'many keep saying, who will put happiness before our eyes?' (v6)

for we sure cannot quite see it!

And we can carry all the questions, regrets, longings deep into our being and act out of them- lashing in anger, accusing others of letting us down, rehearsing our hurts.. So,
'be careful not to sin'
The Bible honestly acknowledges this reality that we are often conflicted and unsure...but teaches us

'on your beds keep silence'

which relates to a word given more than thousand years later:

'do not let the sun go down on your anger, do not give the devil a foothold' (Eph 4v26)

and i wonder: could it be that when we sleep we are vulnerable; and our enemy gladly enter through any breaches in trust. Our unresolved, un-rested  hearts and worried minds are gaps and welcome openings to him; so over time, it just gets easier for him to keep coming back and tormenting us over those same things. Do we feel a rut, an inability to grow, a repeated trend? Perhaps there is a need to quiet, slow, repent and let the One come and seal those gaps. Again, and again.

The greatest marvel of it all is limited man can know and enjoy unlimited transcendent GOD

' to my heart You are a richer joy than all..' (v7).

LORD lead us to This Delight. In your Mercy, hear my prayer.

TREKKING THROUGH THE PSALMS

I'm two weeks late. 

I first sensed it when I looked over my Bible reading guide and it said Psalms. I've read and meditated and milked the Psalms for so much marrow, milk and molassy-sweetness over the years, so I turned my attention to preparing for Advent: the forty days leading up to Christmas. But God was waiting.

For in my journal one day, i was so heavy-hearted i wrote of BUGs: burdens, grief, uncertainties.

This year is filled with BUGs for me. Life goes on, I move on; but my Spirit-awakened heart refuses to just keep going. It broke and the tears came. And I hear the whisper, 'go to the Psalms'. 

The Psalms contain some of the oldest writings in the world: songs of worship. 

Worship is what we give worth and honour to.

The Psalms: personal, corporate; lament & praise; draws us to the truth of the human condition and wraps it in the One who alone can lift us beyond our limited, repeated sorrows.

I continue with my New Jerusalem Bible. {it is highly recommended that you read a different version especially when you feel the Bible getting too familiar & our ugly human pride gets in the way of truly listening as we read}

Psalm 1

v3 ~ every project succeeds
Really? I know how often i feel i failed. Quite a lot recently in fact.
But the One says to me "it's a success! Have you forgotten what I taught you success means? It's about the following, the working from your love, about leaning into the Wind at times and even sitting in the prison; where no one and nothing seems to go your way. Simply because you are Mine, and anyone who seeks to do my will cannot fail for I do not fail."

v5~ YHWH watches over the path of the upright
"It is hard to see the way you are going and I know the pain you feel with every step. But I see it; I am watching over it.  I, even I."

Selah {pause}

v2~ murmurs his law day and night.
this brought a chuckle to me. i think of those religious types who are taught to repeat words that secure salvation. And indeed, I am saved only when I repeat those truth-words: the 'great and precious promises' {2 Peter 1v4} that alone can keep my head turned right and my heart beating tender. The extrovert, take-it-all in part of me often subvert this as i get attracted and distracted.. like someone shared, 'I close my Bible and I forget what i just read'. Reading can be like that. But meeting with Someone usually lingers on.

Psalm 2

v12~ how blessed are all who take refuge in him
there is a little cross-reference to Proverbs 16 and it says, '...listens to YHWH and finds happiness'. {at this moment, the cat looks straight at me as if to say, 'well don't you already know that?'.

This verse comes at the end of an entire Psalm that contrasts the spurious plans of men with the solid Plan of God. We are planners we. Each day, Babel rises and we fight to justify our plans, our ways, our ideas, our dreams. And God says to the nations, to us, "come to your senses, learn your lesson!".

Where are we losing sensibility? In our pine, whine, dine culture, are we become senseless consumers - callous about deeper matters, careless about our attitudes, casual toward God?

What lesson does God want me, you, to learn?
i am a breakaway, runaway, flyaway... are you? My little plans for the days and the long years are little tributaries of God's grand rivers but sometimes I rush the rapids and lose sight of the River.
Perhaps for your, the little brook is drying up? Then, put on hiking boots and beat a trail to the River! Delay not!

Psalm 3

O i love how graphic this gets! The bad guys are so gonna get it. Slap them! Those thousand foes arraigned against me. Reduce them to  nothing.
Shield me.
You-are-the-One who holds my head up. I will not bow, demure, give in, give up.

I  will  look  up --- at You. to You.

Sisters all, we need the 3 S's !

My own journey to my feminine self, speaking to many and walking with individuals over the last decade – deepened my conviction that we need 3 S’s; each one of us.

But these 3 S’s cannot be bought or earned. Instead, they become ours when we are able to receive. And this-is-hard for most of us.

We are natural care-givers, community builders, romantics at heart. We bring beauty, colour and energy to homes, relationships, tasks.  But precisely so, we often find it hard to receive. After all, who gives? Everyone takes.

Plus if we scrub harder; we find that all our giving is a seeking – we want attention, approval, affection, affirmation.

She’s so thoughtful

What a gorgeous dress

 So gifted

How do you do it?

We want the 3 S/s: self-worth, security, significance.

Self-worth is of course now a famous make-up tagline: because you’re worth it! But they get it wrong. A hundred dollar bill will not cease to be worth a hundred dollar even if it got wet, wrinkled and lightly torn. This is the nature of worth. But we live in presentation culture. Recently, the world found its largest gem. It was discovered by a little African girl. The gem however is not hers though she found it. L' Incomparable the diamond  is now worth a whopping 55mil -- because of the process of clarity it underwent and the bejeweling to set it for presentation + all the marketing it generated. I wonder if anyone rewarded that little girl anything decent. In our market culture then, even if we are worth anything, we must showcase this worth with skincare and make up.

A short line from a Taiwanese drama I saw as a little girl has somehow stayed with me. In it two girlfriends were talking – about men. One of them was explaining her choice of man: “he can give me security” (he was the richer option).  But can he, truly? Security is elusive as long as we are counting on fallible humans to supply us with it.  People change, economies crash, love turns cold.

Some 980 million women and children live below the poverty line. Their dreams are basic. If they want to be noticed; it’s because they don’t want to miss any handouts. But for many of us who never ever really worry about staying alive; we who have clambered up Maslow’s pyramid; we crave the attention that will proclaim, “she’s really something!”.

Worth.Security.Significance.

We simply cannot live without them. So we will find them – somehow.

Unless ~

There is a way that they come to us – as whispers from beyond, gifts that turn up at our door....

The birthday surprise {I am worth celebrating}

The words that reassure {I am supported and defended}

The way we fight for our children {I make a difference}

Life offers us moments when we can choose to believe afresh that we have worth, are secure and have significance. But life also throws us all about and all of it can become gnarled and shredded.

So I dig deeper and track further to find a more steady spring of wellness… to that ~

“spring of living water, the cistern that holds water”  

Jeremiah 2v13

a Quiet Morning Log

7am 

My alarm goes off, I feel my cat’s warm furry, purring body. She’s so rested. I need to get up to where I learn rest – for my depths. What holds in every storm-tossed soul is the quiet centre.

730am 

the train is packed with humanity trying to awake and live. One lady is too tired and succumbs to sleep. Another is putting on her mascara. Another is catching up on her Korean drama. The younger set mostly have their ears plugged. Most of the rest and standing in silence but I sense the cacophony of souls as surely as I see the faces of wear and worry.

745am 

This month I have not received any confirmed registrations. And I am tempted to stay home when this happens. But I know that this is not just for others. It’s also for me: I have set a date with my Maker and I intend to show up. Sure, he’s everywhere; but we know – that often means we are nowhere near Him. The Psalmist words come to mind, “when can I go to meet with my God?”  This longing is in our hearts especially when things get too much. But perhaps if we asked this regularly and then met Him regularly; things may not get too much so quickly.

The old hymn I learnt from the Methodist church rises within me, “Take time to be holy, speak oft with Thy Lord..”. Yes, if anything is equally allotted to us it is the hours in a day: twenty-four. If you are so blessed that you don’t have to hold three jobs and labour from dawn to midnight; take time, make time, to be holy! Holiness is a force that grows with habit.

812am 

I walk briskly into the Cathedral, aware I am late-- and nearly missed her! One person showed up. She had written two emails with profuse apology that she’s not an early riser although she so much wants to experience this. Today, she tells me her husband apologies that he needs to set the alarm for six; and although a pre-believer, he offers to ride her to the Cathedral. She had heard me teach about Journaling and our spiritual growth and wanted to experience the Quiet Morning because at the session I taught, she had found a ‘freedom’.

As we sat, questions and concerns began to tumble out all over. I listened and then directed her on how to spend her morning, prayed and sent her off to be alone with God using the guided format I provide.

As I sat with God, I also prayed for her. She is sincere but there is much that can hinder her. Yet I have a quiet confidence – for God always shows up when we do!

915am 

I walk over quietly and sat near her. She raised her head and I motioned to join her. Her notepad had lines of words on it. We talked about the experience and  she shared with me astonishingly personal words she sensed God gave her. Still more questions; we talked and then I invited her to pray as we close the time. She was nervous but she complied and I heard an earnest, honest prayer that warmed my heart. We hugged and I send her off into the day ahead of her.

I turned to make my way home too.

Next Quiet Morning happens on: Nov 8^th. 

Pls email me at jenni.yt.hohuan@gmail.com if you want to participate.

and here's the music & words for the hymn  ~"take time to be holy"

半边天 – half the sky. This is a Chinese saying that up-ends the patriarchal reality: yes, men rule; but women cover half the sky!

Indeed we do! But -- what kind of cover do we provide?

There are skies we love to look up at, those clear blue hues with white clouds dancing. But is this the inviting cover I provide that draws people out to wonder, brings on the smiles, stirs dreams..

Tracing God’s handiwork; I see him shaping me to be a cover that brings safety, encourages truth, and promotes breakthroughs. And it took years to see myself truly: both present darkness and powerful Light, and the ongoing Grace to choose the light.

There were moments as a growing gal when I was struck by some things my mom did, at other times; I just sensed her sacrifices and stress, and I would hold my questions or try to be quieter. But my first real foray outside my own little self must be learning to love my father. 

It’s always the hard stuff that breaks us open and lets out the light.

Father did not meet my expectations, but I had a holy duty to draw him to God, so I gritted my teeth and asked him countless times to my notions of a better life.

Nothing really worked. I hit a thick impenetrable wall and collapsed in hot frustrated tears. That’s when God shaped the way I would provide cover…He asked if I would be my father’s ‘friend’.  Resistance was futile with God; so I agreed.

It’s amazing what shifts when we say Yes to God.

We started to talk. Like friends. I saw my father not as a failed model of parenthood but as a person; a deeply wounded person. What I saw changed my heart, my mind, my words… and I had to lay down my grandiose plans of ‘convertng’ the man, to simply learning about him and loving him.

More was to come.

 I had been in leadership roles most of my life. Then I started to lead a mixed group of peers at different places spiritually and in life. Now I see how that drew me to extend a cover over them of care, patience and prayer. I used to be at my wits' end so much I would cry-pray in my shower before I met them!

And God always showed up.

Good preparation for the pastor-to-be!

For thirteen years now, I have the most freedom and power to provide cover: as a mom. I had to make active choices about what to clothe, feed, speak into the hearts of my little ones. I have the ability to weave hope into the fabric of their souls. I have the grand opportunity to raise a new kind of being. They needed a blanket of security to discover life, themselves and others. They needed a firm reining in that will set boundaries for truth and life to thrive. They needed to be shielded, defended, protected. They needed me to cover them over with faith, hope, and love.

Women reach over, reach out, and -- cover. 

So each day and each season is filled with the same essential Q: what sort of cover will I be? Will I gladly be one and find the joys being a cover brings?

Next: foils of lightning and thunder peals…