半边天 – half the sky. This is a Chinese saying that up-ends the patriarchal reality: yes, men rule; but women cover half the sky!

Indeed we do! But -- what kind of cover do we provide?

There are skies we love to look up at, those clear blue hues with white clouds dancing. But is this the inviting cover I provide that draws people out to wonder, brings on the smiles, stirs dreams..

Tracing God’s handiwork; I see him shaping me to be a cover that brings safety, encourages truth, and promotes breakthroughs. And it took years to see myself truly: both present darkness and powerful Light, and the ongoing Grace to choose the light.

There were moments as a growing gal when I was struck by some things my mom did, at other times; I just sensed her sacrifices and stress, and I would hold my questions or try to be quieter. But my first real foray outside my own little self must be learning to love my father. 

It’s always the hard stuff that breaks us open and lets out the light.

Father did not meet my expectations, but I had a holy duty to draw him to God, so I gritted my teeth and asked him countless times to my notions of a better life.

Nothing really worked. I hit a thick impenetrable wall and collapsed in hot frustrated tears. That’s when God shaped the way I would provide cover…He asked if I would be my father’s ‘friend’.  Resistance was futile with God; so I agreed.

It’s amazing what shifts when we say Yes to God.

We started to talk. Like friends. I saw my father not as a failed model of parenthood but as a person; a deeply wounded person. What I saw changed my heart, my mind, my words… and I had to lay down my grandiose plans of ‘convertng’ the man, to simply learning about him and loving him.

More was to come.

 I had been in leadership roles most of my life. Then I started to lead a mixed group of peers at different places spiritually and in life. Now I see how that drew me to extend a cover over them of care, patience and prayer. I used to be at my wits' end so much I would cry-pray in my shower before I met them!

And God always showed up.

Good preparation for the pastor-to-be!

For thirteen years now, I have the most freedom and power to provide cover: as a mom. I had to make active choices about what to clothe, feed, speak into the hearts of my little ones. I have the ability to weave hope into the fabric of their souls. I have the grand opportunity to raise a new kind of being. They needed a blanket of security to discover life, themselves and others. They needed a firm reining in that will set boundaries for truth and life to thrive. They needed to be shielded, defended, protected. They needed me to cover them over with faith, hope, and love.

Women reach over, reach out, and -- cover. 

So each day and each season is filled with the same essential Q: what sort of cover will I be? Will I gladly be one and find the joys being a cover brings?

Next: foils of lightning and thunder peals…

Failure isn't final. Grace is.

Real, exaggerated, painful, fuzzy, cloudy, dragged-out…many circumstances can make us feel like we failed.

Life is too rich and layered for us to plot onto spreadsheets or subject to the see-saw of a cost-benefit analysis. Results and outcomes can be hard to measure; and the enemy loves to sidle up and whisper ‘what a let down’, ‘this is so disappointing’, or more directly, ‘you failed!’.

Whether we made a bad decision, or we feel at the mercy of difficult people and situations; a sense of having failed, being left in the cold by God, losing our way can crowd into our hearts and weigh it with heaviness. It can fog up our minds and even make us throw in the towel. Just give up!

Ask Peter.

Jesus even pre-empted his failure with a warning; but his quick words of denial turned around like a boomerang and knocked him over. The next time we read, he has gone back to fishing.

You and I have read this story countless times. Today though, I hear something more. I connected this failure with other failures. I thought of Moses losing his cool and losing his chance of going into the Promised Land. What a high price! I remember my daughter asking me as she read Genesis, “why did God put that tree there?”.  Yes, sometimes, it can feel like God has set us up to fail. Surely, the Almighty can help Peter bite his tongue and Moses cool over for once?

Why does God let us fail?

More importantly, what does God do when we fail? 

He rushes to us with Tenderness. {which also shows how he feels}

 Adam and Eve receive a garment God personally stitches together.

Moses is laid to rest by God’s own hand.

Peter is fed Jesus-baked fish on a shore.

God becomes personal, and He personally delivers us even as we feel the heaviness of our failure.

He clothes us
"and the LORD God made for Adam and for his wife garments of skins and clothed them"

He closes the chapter
"the LORD said to him, 'this is the land...and he buried him  in the valley.."

He commissions us afresh
"..feed my sheep.."

We think our gleaming trophies are what brings God glory. Success is the processed diet we have been fed that has left our immunity weak; making us vulnerable to lies and despair.

We must make changes to our diet, to ‘taste and see that the LORD is good’ – especially where we feel are failures. For our failures are never final. Grace is.

~ Grace flows downwards ~

jenni tweets

those cute minions..

We've all seen them. These guys are in-season, so they are everywhere: wallpaper, cakes. lanterns...

i'm no movie person but when my children were watching Despicable Me, and laughing; i had to go join them.

Sometimes, my family thinks i'm too austere and hard on a little 'entertainment'. But it is also clear to them that I am the 'crank-up-the-fun-o-meter' in the home person. It's clear that I love fun, funny, happy. So yes, they're a little mystified.

When i was a teen, i wanted so much to be fun and funny, at one point i had a notebook where i collected jokes. Thankfully, i'm not very persevering back then....or it may be me doing Comedy night!

So fun has always coursed in my vessels.

But, i-am-careful, even a tad skeptical of  'entertainment'. Why? Because as far as I am informed; this world is not neutral ground. Every inch is value-laden. There is no moral high ground; there's just ground; the ground of our being -- and whatever our religious persuasions; there are lines we won't cross, and evil is real.

So, i am alert. Darkness seems to have a way of winning the day without anyone noticing it. It creeps into our consciousness, comforts and culture slowly and persistently until we wake up and the world seemed changed! When did divorce, pre-marital sex, gun ownership, terrorism become common-place? While we were snoozing. Like the waves that lap slowly and changes the shoreline.

Today, we have to deal with so much violence within, between and among us.

Since most of us feed upon a popular media diet; we must ask what has been on the menu?

Have we become more accepting of evil, violence, fragmentation?
Are we unable now to resist because we have not built the muscles that can swim against the tide?

So what's the deal with Despicable Me?  i found it laugh-out loud funny. The minions were so clueless and adorable. The movie's quite clear subtext is what i surfaced with the kids:
Why was he bad? -- "coz his mom ignored him; he's an angry person"
Do people become bad and then good? -- "in their actions they can choose"
Who is your fav character, why? -- "the lil kids! they were powerful, they changed his life"

There's good stuff to be mined. {cultivating a questioning spirit not a cynical one is what we're after}
#We all impact others.
#We should seek to be well so badness doesn't root in us.

Then we revisit the Great Story...and we tracked to this: God is not after us being kinda good people. God is after our heart, for everything flows from it.

But i linger on.. we laugh at the exaggerated number of weapons used to defend one's fort. We are drawn to the possibility of love and dreams when the orphaned gals enter the scene. We weep quietly to find the bad guy grew up rejected. Those are serious themes!
Do we see threat all around and find it hard to trust?
Do we consider that life may turn out very differently because of...children?
Do we have roots of rejection that we need to pluck up and clear out?

Sadly, in a way, the 'heroes' of our imagination are the cutesy minions; the clueless ones. They are the ones who make the merchandise, and sing the music! The minions are cute; but let's be careful we don't end up minions serving changes that will take us down further.

"If we're spiritual beings, then it is the spirit of things that get to us & linger on to shape us"

~ jenni tweets ~

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